


The Rising

by Pretty_Hurts



Category: In the Flesh (TV), Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M, Partially Deceased Syndrome, The Rising (In the Flesh)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-17
Updated: 2015-06-29
Packaged: 2018-03-30 23:47:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3956479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pretty_Hurts/pseuds/Pretty_Hurts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the Flesh meets Gallavich</p><p>It’s been 6 years since Ian Gallagher has seen his family. Granted, being dead will do that to you. He’s been thinking about them a lot lately. What will they think of him? Will they accept him for what he is?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first multi-chap. I really liked the show In the Flesh so I wanted to write the in the flesh storyline with the shameless characters. It might be a little confusing at first but it'll make sense soon.

It’s been 6 years since Ian Gallagher has seen his family. Granted, being dead will do that to you. He’s been thinking about them a lot lately. What will they think of him? Will they accept him for what he is? 

 

They call it Partially Diseased Syndrome, which is just a fancy term for undead. It all started on December 9, 2014. That’s when the rising happened. Most of them didn’t survive but the ones that did were taken to the treatment center. They found a way to reconnect them to their old selves which led to them not having any more cravings for human flesh. The treatments, however, only last for 24 hours so if they miss a treatment they go back to being rabid. There’s no telling what Ian did in his untreated state. Most PDS sufferers have dreams and flashbacks of what they did and the people they killed but Ian, he gets flashbacks of Mickey. The boy he once loved, that he would do anything for, that he would never see again. The flashbacks are caused by the treatment, it shows you your biggest fears and regrets. Ian wished he could see the faces of the people he actually killed, that would hurt a lot less than seeing Mickey. 

*****

5 and half years ago  
“Ian, are you okay?” asked Fiona, not sure how to comfort her brother.

Ian stayed seated and stared down at his hands trying not to think. 

“How?” he asked coldly.

Fiona, eyes filled with tears, looked down at him confused. “How what?”

“How did he die?” he asked showing no signs of emotion.

“I…I don’t know. I think it was an explosion on his base.”

“This is all my fault.” Finally letting the tears roll down his face he got and ran upstairs to his room, shoved a few items in his pocket and left. 

 

At this moment Ian didn’t know how to feel. The person he loved more than anything was gone and he felt like his heart could stop beating and it wouldn’t matter. So he decided it didn’t matter. He made his way to the abandoned building where they used to do target practice preparing for when Ian would join the army. It was also the place Ian first told Mickey he loved him. When Mickey hadn’t been able to tell him he loved him back he decided to show him instead. So mickey blindfolded Ian and took him to the abandoned building and left him inside. It was then he saw I+M 4 EVER carved into the wall. And when he went outside to find Mickey he saw the words I LOVE YOU spray painted on the outside of the building. That’s when Ian knew he never wanted be away from Mickey ever again.  
When he finally got there he saw the giant I love you that had faded a bit from the weather and decided it was too much. Fighting the feelings he had he made his way into the building so he could see the carving one last time. He didn’t want to feel anymore. The guilt, the pain, even the love, it was more than he could handle. He couldn’t live in a world without Mickey Milkovich. 

He reached in his pocket and found the Swiss army knife Lip gave him for his birthday and that was it.

Lip found him the next day, and a little part of him would always hate Ian for leaving him. Lip was never the same after that. He found it hard to have a purpose in the world. If people could just up and decide one day that they want to leave you, what’s the point? It wasn’t until the rising 5 years later that Lip felt he found his calling. With the undead roaming the streets Lip took leadership and started the Human Volunteer Force also known as the HVF. He felt it was his duty to save his neighborhood. He ran to the Milkovich home knowing that would be the nearest place to find guns and found his first recruits Iggy and Colin Milkovich. A few months passed and the HVF only got stronger. When news came that there was a cure for the undead and that all undead were to be taken to the treatment center in the North Side of town the HVF lost a number of members. They didn’t really see the point anymore but Lip believed this was his calling, to be the one who could stop the end of the world. 

While he, Iggy, Colin and a few others were on a food and supply run they were ambushed and Lip immediately grabbed his gun prepared to shoot any of them down. What he wasn’t prepared for was his younger brother trying to kill him. Lip held him back in shock and looked around to see if others were paying him any attention. They kind of had their hands full at the moment. Lip grabbed Ian and what looked like Karen Jackson and brought them to treatment center in secret. He never uttered a word to anyone. 

 

Two weeks later Fiona was contacted by someone from the treatment center and told that her brother was found and he should be ready to come home in the next few months. Fiona rushed to tell her siblings. At first they were confused but they were just happy at a chance to have their brother back. When Lip didn’t seem so enthused Fiona took notice but she understood why.

Lip on the other hand knew he was fucked. He started a whole movement of people who believed in something. He turned Iggy and Colin Milkovich into town leaders. They would’ve ended up in jail or worse but he gave them something to believe in. He had people who worshipped him. Was he really going to give that up for a brother who didn’t even bother to say goodbye before he killed himself. No. He liked what he had and he wasn’t gonna let Ian take any more away from him.


	2. Hopeless Opus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian struggles to adjust to his new life.

Ian found life at the treatment center difficult. He’d been there for nearly three months already. While everyone else was enjoying being back he didn’t really see the point of it all. They came back to life only to be haunted by their past and things they could never change. It seemed like indefinite punishment. 

He had definitely become a little more pessimistic but that’s only because he couldn’t see a future for himself. What was he supposed to do now that he was back? Go home to the family he abandoned. They probably hated him. He tries not to think about them too much because if he lets those emotions in he’s not sure what he’ll do so he buries them inside, hoping they’ll just stay there forever. 

At the treatment center all they did was make them talk about their families and what they were planning to do. The first few group meetings were mainly introductions and how everyone was reacting to the treatment and being back and trying to understand what was happening to them.

No one in their group really had all of their memories back they just had a sense of who they were. Karen was the first to open up the nightmares and flashbacks. 

“I remember being hit by a car, I was waiting for someone, I think and then I got hit by a car and died. After that I rose up and I think Ian and I were hunting people together, anyone we could get our hands on.” Karen was visibly upset and it was clear she didn’t want to keep talking so Ian jumped in.

“I don’t remember any of that. I just get flashbacks of someone I used to know.” Ian said quietly. He didn’t want to participate but he also wanted to take some of the heat off Karen.

“Care to elaborate?” the group leader asked. But Ian just shook his head. “You sure? This is the most you’ve talked since you got here.”

“I just don’t like to think about it. If I do, it’ll be like before and well, you’ve seen the scars.” Ian said smugly, showing the scars on his wrists to the group with a smirk on his face. They stared at him in shock but he honestly couldn’t care less.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” A random from the group asked. Ian looked up at her but didn’t say anything. “Some of us are actually glad to be back.”

“You think is a gift?” he giggled. “We’re fucking monster’s, we killed people, you think the people out there are gonna accept that? This isn’t a gift it’s a fucking curse.” He stormed off to his room where he found his roommate Nate acting weirder than usual.

Nate had been there a little longer than Ian and was soon to be on his way out.

“The fuck are you so happy about?” Ian asked annoyed.

“Going home in a few weeks. Maybe that has something to do with it.” 

Knowing Nate was more familiar with the treatment center Ian figured he could give him a little more insight into what the fuck is going on. 

“I don’t know why they make us talk about shit. If we take the treatments and they connect us to who we were before why would talking about it make it feel any better to be back?” Ian asked.

“They want us to connect with all the emotions not just what we felt before we died.” Nate stated.

“What do you mean?”

“What was the last thing you felt before you died?”

“I never really thought about it.”

“Well try, maybe you’ll get something.” Nate walked out of the room to give Ian time to  
think.

Ian leaned against the wall of his room. What did Nate mean? What else is there to feel when you’re dying other than relief? It’s over. Your shitty miserable existence is over.

Nate popped his head in after a few minutes. “Did you figure it out?”

“Relief.”

“Do you remember how you were before that?”

“I was okay I guess. I can’t really think about that.”

“Come one, Gallagher, tell me one happy moment you’ve ever had.” Nate pushed further because he knew Ian needed it or he’d be stuck.

“I don’t remember ever being happy.”

“Ding ding ding! There it is! That feeling of hopelessness and relief before you died is affecting how you are now. I doubt you were an unemotional robot asshole before, you smile in your sleep for Christ sake!” 

“I do? But that’s only when I see…” Ian shoved the thoughts of Mickey back deep in his mind but Nate could swear he saw Ian smiling a faint genuine smile. 

“See that’s why they make us talk about it. So we can get a sense of who we were before all the shit happened, so we can become who we’re supposed to be. We won’t really be the same person but maybe we could be better.” That seemed to get Ian thinking, at least now he could had something else to occupy his mind. 

After that Ian started talking more in the group sessions and the more he talked the more everyone else talked. He wanted to remember what being happy felt like. The more they talked it became less about them coming back to life and more about them actually being people. He never once brought up Mickey though. He talked about Fiona, Lip, Debbie, Carl, Liam and even Frank but never Mickey. Even though Ian was feeling more like himself he couldn’t help but feel like a piece of him was missing. He felt empty but he didn’t want to be any more cynical than he already was.

He also found himself getting along with Karen more too. Something about death suited her more than how she was before.

The next group session was interesting though because Karen brought up something that Ian couldn’t forget.

It was Nate’s last day before he was being picked by his family the next morning, so he wanted to help everyone regain more of themselves, like he already had. He asked everyone the same questions he asked Ian a few weeks ago.

“Karen, what was the last thing you felt before you died?”

She thought hard before she let a low mumble. “fear…Fear.” 

No one said anything, they wanted her to process the information on her own.  
She looked like she was putting puzzle pieces together in her head and then she spoke softly. “It was her. She hit me. I was waiting for him and she hit me.”

“Who hit you?” Another group member asked intrigued by Karen’s realization.

“A girl from my neighborhood who’s brother had just died in the army.”  
Ian’s head shot up, he immediately knew who she was talking about. That didn’t mean he believed her. 

The meeting continued and the group got closer as they revealed their realizations. When the meeting was over Ian grabbed Karen to talk in a corner.

“I know you were talking about Mandy, my fucking best friend. You expect me to believe she hit you with a car and killed you?” He accused.

“I know what I saw that night, it was her.” Ian shook his head and was about to speak but Karen looked up at him and spoke first “Do you know who I was waiting for?”

Ian looked back at her confused. “No. who?”

“Lip.” Ian looked at her shocked. “He texted me to meet him at the park. I went there thinking he wanted to get back together.”

“There’s no way Lip texted you. Sorry, but he was done with you. You were bad for him and Mandy was good. She got him into college and you tricked him into thinking someone else’s kid was his. You kind of fucked him up for the rest of his life.”

“You think I don’t know that! I was a horrible fucking person. But something’s different now, I can feel it. We’ve been given a second chance not to fuck shit up and fix shit we fucked up. What are you gonna do with yours?”

“I have no idea.” It was a valid question though. Ian knew he had to work on building a relationship with his family first and foremost. Everything else was a distraction.

“Exactly.” There was a brief pause. “I’m not gonna tell anyone about Mandy you know that right… In some strange way I kind of get why she did it.”

Not knowing how to respond Ian didn’t say anything he just smiled at his new friend that he used to hate.

*****

Three months later…

“What color were your eyes before?” The woman asked.

“Green” Ian said as she handed him a box.

“These are your contacts and mousse to help you blend in better.” She said with a smile on her face.

Ian went to bathroom and stared at himself in the mirror. His skin was so pale, his eyes even paler, his hair was still bright red and that made him feel a little better. After putting on the contacts and mousse Ian was shocked to see how much he looked like himself and didn’t at the same time. He was in the waiting area when he spotted Karen. It was scary to see how normal she looked, she would’ve looked even more normal if it wasn’t for the scar on the left side of her face that went from her hairline to her eyebrow being held together by staples.

10 Minutes later he spotted Sheila Jackson with Frank and was confused by the sight. He knew they were dating at one point but for them to still be together after like 8 years was weird. When Sheila saw Karen she was taken back by the sight.

“Wow honey, I didn’t expect you to look so normal.” Karen took that as an invitation and gave her mom the biggest hug she could. “I’m so glad you’re here.” Sheila says as tears form in her eyes.

“Me too mom.” Karen was now crying. 

“What are you doing here Frank?” Ian asked.

“Picking up my daughter. What does it look like I’m doing?” He said nonchalantly.

“I don’t know what I expected the answer to be.” Ian hugged Karen goodbye promising they’d hang out soon and patiently waited for his family. It was getting later in the morning they were supposed to pick him up at 9 and it was already 11. Just when he started to lose all hope the Gallagher squad came in and rushed him not even waiting to see if he was going to attack them or not. He noticed how much everyone had changed, especially Liam, but chose not to mention it. He wasn’t but still he could be dangerous. It took a few minutes for him to notice Lip’s absence.

“Sorry we’re late, we got a little lost on the way.”

Debbie and Carl weren’t sure how to act but Carl was the first to break the ice.

“You know you’re kind of our little brother now, right.”

“Carl!” Debbie yelled as she hit him in the arm after noticing the shock on Ian’s face.

“It’s okay. I just never really thought about it.” But it wasn’t okay, Ian never really had time think about how his actions affected his younger siblings. He pushed those thoughts aside and tried to focus on being reunited with his family.

“Where’s Lip?” Everyone looked around at each other not wanting to say anything.

“He had some stuff to take care of I’m sure you’ll see him around sooner or later.” Fiona finally said. “Come on let’s get you home.” She put her arm around him and didn’t let go until they got to the car.

“When did you get a car?” Ian asked forgetting it’s been almost 6 years since he’s seen them

“She didn’t.” A male voice came from the driver’s seat with an unfamiliar face.

“Ian this is Gus, my husband.” Ian stared at her shocked. “I know, I know, Fiona Gallagher married, who knew.”

Ian didn’t say anything after that. He noticed Carl and Debbie staring but he didn’t care his mind was occupied by the fact that he was back home and he was happy even if he couldn’t really show it. After the hour and an half drive home Ian stood in front of his house that he never thought he would see again. He stepped inside to find Fiona preparing lunch for Liam. Debbie and Carl were nowhere to be found and Liam was watching TV in the living room.

“Do you need anything? Food or Water?” Fiona asked curiously.

“I can’t eat or drink. It makes me sick.” 

“What do you want to do?”

“I kinda just want to go to my room and let this sink in.” Ian said forgetting that his room might not even be his anymore. 

“The beds still there but… Lip put your things in the attic. I was surprised he didn’t want to get rid of them.” She regretted it as soon as she said it. Ian stared at her confused

“Why would he throw my things away?”

Fiona hesitated before answering. “He was so angry at you for leaving. It was him who found you, you know. I don’t know how he knew where you were but after he heard about Mickey he ran to find you and he did.” Tears were rolling down her face now.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered before making his way upstairs. He felt bad but he didn’t want to think about Fiona or Lip right now. He just wanted to not feel anything at least for a little while. 

He spent 2 hours laying on his bed staring at the ceiling trying not to focus on any one thought in particular. He was still feeling pretty low even though even though he knew he should be happy to be back in his old life. He decided he could distract himself by going through his old shit.

After giving Ian a few hours to adjust Fiona decided check in on him. She found him trying to look through his things in the attic.

“Do you need any help? I’m pretty sure I saw Carl rifling through this stuff a few years ago, he might be able to give you an insight on what’s going on up here.”

It was definitely a mess but he didn’t mind it. “I don’t mind the mess but if I need him I’ll ask.” He knew what he was looking for but he thought it would only make Fiona worry more,

“Okay well dinners happening in an hour so…” He looked at her confused, which she noticed. “I know you don’t eat but we can’t have a family dinner without our guest of honor.”

“Guest of Honor. Really.” Ian smiled.

“We really missed you. Having you back is like a dream come true. I never thought I would see you again.” Fiona tried to stop herself from crying because she didn’t want Ian to blame himself. She just wanted him to be happy to be home.

“I missed you too, Fi.” He really meant it too.

After searching for an hour and not being able to find what he was looking for he went downstairs to find everyone preparing for dinner.

It was really weird being back for him. Everyone took their seats at the dinner table, Fiona and Gus and Liam sat on one side of the table, Debbie and Carl on the other side and Ian at the head. With all the conversations about school and work Ian was finally starting to feel like he was home. 

Lip walked into the house and immediately caught sight of Ian. Ian was happy to see him until he opened his mouth.

“Are you fucking serious? This is what the big family dinner was about?”

“Lip, come on he just got home can you not make this about you for at least a few weeks maybe?” Debbie spoke up, which shocked everyone else as much as much as it did Ian.

“So that’s how it is huh?” Lip looked around at everyone. “I’m not staying here until that” he gestured at Ian “is gone.”

Ian looked at Lip who was avoiding eye contact and then stormed off upstairs and Lip took his seat at the table. Debbie got up to follow him and said one last thing to Lip.

“You can’t keep blaming him for everything wrong in your life, because I’m pretty sure you were still this much of an asshole before he died.”

“Yea. I’m the asshole.” Lip said smugly.

Debbie found Ian sitting in his bed.

“What the fuck just happened?” Ian asked confused.

Debbie sighed. “Lip’s not really a fan of your kind. He thinks he found his calling to protect everyone from you guys, he even has loyal followers and weapons and everything. They think they’re the fucking military. Fiona didn’t want us to tell you but it’s kinda dangerous out there and Lip probably thinks you being back will affect how the others see him. At first I got why he was doing it because people were dying but now I think he’s just addicted to the power and is playing on everyone’s fear.”

“I don’t even know what to say to that. I guess I’ll just leave him alone for a while, I was kinda looking forward to taking to him.”

“Maybe you should still try. If anyone can get through to him it's you.” She said being hopeful. “Okay. I’m gonna head out but I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye.” And now Ian was alone with his thoughts. He didn’t know what to think but he definitely didn’t want to leave his room and risk bumping into Lip so he just went to sleep.


	3. Mourning Doves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian finally opens up and Lip and Mandy are keeping a secret.

Ian woke up the next morning after the family dinner from hell and although it didn’t crack the top 5 most fucked up Gallagher dinners, Ian still felt like shit. He couldn’t help but feel like there was more to the Lip story than him not liking his kind. He put on his makeup and contacts and went downstairs to find that no one was home and then there was a knock on the door. He didn’t know if he was supposed to answer the door or not, he just assumed people weren’t supposed to know he was back. Who would be coming to the Gallagher house at 9:30 in the morning? He decided to chance it, luckily on the other side of the door was Karen and Sheila. He’s never been this happy to see Karen Jackson a day in his life. He gives her the biggest hug he can.

“Jesus, it’s been like a day since I last saw you.” Karen says sarcastically even though she still hugged him back.

“I know, I just missed you.” Then he remembered the fact that they were standing in his kitchen and he didn’t know why they were there. “What are you guys doing here?” he asked curiously.

“My mom’s a PDS Community Care Officer, she’s here to give you your treatment and teach Debbie how to do it.”

“Yea, I got a call out of the blue a few months ago, they said I was in their system as a primary caregiver and asked if I was interested to train to become a PDS Community Care Officer, I said of course, anything to help in this brave new world.” Sheila said as she smiled.

Debbie walked in a few minutes later. “Sorry I’m late” she says as she hugs Ian. “Okay, let’s do this!”

As Debbie and Sheila stood behind him Ian couldn’t help but dread getting the treatment, because he knew what was coming.

Debbie stared at the syringe as Sheila was showing her where to inject the treatment.  
“You see this hole here? You just put the syringe in the hole and press the trigger and that’s it.”

Ian gripped harder onto his chair as flashes of Mickey clouded his mind and just as quick as it happened it was over.

Debbie noticed Ian’s discomfort.

Debbie looked at Ian suspiciously not knowing what was going on in his head. “How many times does he have to go through that?”

“Everyday.”

“What does it do exactly? … The treatment?” Debbie asked.

“It helps with balancing the chemicals in the brain.”

“Hey are you ok?” Karen said as she looked at her mom who was suspiciously talking to Debbie. “How was your first night back?”

“Not as great as yours probably.”

“When I got home, my room was like a shrine to my entire existence. I just feel bad for my mom, all the shit I put her through just come back and make shit even more difficult.”

“What happened to you being a changed person? All that shit that happened in the past doesn’t mean shit anymore. If you want things to be different you have to make it different.” As he spoke he couldn’t believe the words that came out of his mouth, maybe he should try taking his own advice.

“I was hoping I would run into Lip to thank him.” Ian looked back her confused.

“Thank him for what?”

“Are you joking? … For bringing us to the treatment center.”  
Ian was dumbfounded. “I had no idea. But then why was he acting like such an asshole last night?”

“I wouldn’t know, you haven’t told me anything since I got here.” She said sarcastically. Ian sighed and explained the events of yesterday to Karen.

“It was so weird seeing everybody at first, and then we got back here and I just wanted to feel like my old self again even for a little while. So I went to the attic where all my stuff is but I couldn’t find what I was looking for. And then there was the dinner from hell where I thought I was gonna start making up for lost time with my family instead I get ignored by Lip.

“The crazy thing is, I was so excited to see him, above everyone else, I was hoping he would jog this piece of my memory and I would suddenly be me again.”… “He didn’t even look at me.”

“Maybe you should try to talk to him.” She said hopefully.

“That’s exactly what Debbie said.”

Debbie and Sheila made their way back over to them.

“You ready to go, honey?” Shelia asked Karen.

Karen looked at Ian. “I think I’m just gonna hang out here for a while.” Sheila looked worried and Karen noticed. “We’ll be fine, we’re gonna stay in the house, everything’s gonna be fine. I’ll call you when we’re done.”

“Okay, just remember there are rules for a reason.” Sheila said looking worried.

Although Ian wouldn’t admit it he was glad Karen was staying. He needed someone right now. Sheila nodded and left. Ian smiled at Karen.

“I have class in an hour, so I’m gonna head out too but I’ll see you tomorrow, okay.” Debbie left and Karen and Ian fell into a conversation.

“My mom’s probably gonna cry on the way home?” Karen said partially worried and sarcastic.

“At least she’s happy to have you back, our situations are totally different.”

“I know, it’s just I feel like she’s clinging to her memory of me she’s had for the past the 5 years and now I’m back and I have no idea what’s gonna happen.”

“You wanna know something weird?” Ian said trying to lighten the mood. “I have no idea who lives here. Fiona’s married, Lip, Debbie and Carl are practically adults, everyone’s lives moved on without me. Not that I didn’t want them to. It’s just… weird.” Ian says realizing he didn’t lighten the mood at all.

“And it feels like I’m on suicide watch, like everyone’s tip-toeing around me.”

“Well technically you did kill yourself.” Karen said sarcastically.

Ian smirked because she kind of had a point.

“You never told me what you were looking for in the attic.”

“Because I was hoping to avoid that.” Ian said looking down.

“Ian, I know you never really liked me before but I’m your friend now, maybe even your best friend. You don’t have to tell me shit but I want you to know you can talk to me about anything, look at all the shit I’ve done, I’m not gonna judge you for the shit you’ve done.”

And so he told her… The greatest most fucked up love story ever told.

He told her about how he and Mickey started and how they actually started getting more serious and how fucked up everything was but it was still beautiful.

“I loved him more than life itself, which I guess is pretty ironic now huh?” Ian laughed dryly.

“It’s my fault he’s dead.”

“His dad caught us one day and beat the shit out of us. And after a few weeks went by without him talking to me I found out his dad made him join the army and I was 17 so I couldn’t join. He sent me postcards, which is what I was looking for in the attic, and then the postcards stopped coming. And then I find out there was an explosion on his base and he was dead just like that. The love of my life was gone and I was just supposed to accept that, to live the rest of my life broken with my heart in pieces. No, so I opted out and put no thought into it. And now here I am back to life and while I’ve come back home I don’t really feel like I’ve come home.”

“It’s like the universe is punishing me for what I did. I see his face every time I take the treatment and whenever I fall asleep.” 

“Wow, I don’t ever think I’ve ever heard you talk that much. So you and Mickey huh? Shit.”

“Do you have anything else to say other than reactions?”

“Ian what do you want me to say? You came back for a reason, maybe the universe is giving you a chance to start over from scratch. You have to forgive yourself for what happened to Mickey, especially since it wasn’t your fault. You can’t carry that around forever.”

After Karen left Ian was back to dealing with his own life. It’s easier to just focus on other people’s problems than to focus on his own until Karen made him focus on himself. He was forced to deal with his life for a few minutes every day like fucking clockwork, and it was easy for him to push those thoughts away. But ever since he got home there’s a part of him that just wants to be the old him again, but he knows that will never happen. It’s like he’s forgotten that part of himself and he can pretend that he’s ok all he wants but nothing’s gonna change how he feels. 

But now he couldn’t stop thinking about Lip.

*****

Lip woke up around noon still reeling from the night before. He looked over next to him and Mandy was still sound asleep. He looked around his apartment and thought to himself about last night. Who the fuck did Debbie she was talking to him like that? He was the President of the Human Volunteer Force tasked with the duty of protecting their neighborhood from the people they’re so willingly letting back into their fucking homes. 

He started thinking about the day he had planned, he didn’t know if he was mentally prepared. He saw Ian for the first time last night, not the monster he found 6 months ago, but his teenage brother that he lost so long ago. He looked exactly the same and that scared the shit out of him. It would be so easy for Ian to weasel his way back into Lip’s life and make him forgive him. Lip knows that but then he thinks about all the people that look up to him, shit even Terry Milkovich respects him. At that moment Lip realizes he has to hate Ian. Not only for what he did to him but because of what he is. Ian is the enemy.

“Hey are you okay? You look a little tense, like more than usual.” Mandy asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just got a lot of shit on my mind.”

“How was dinner with your family yesterday? Anything interesting happen?” 

“Nope, nothing to report. Come on let’s get ready we got a lot of stuff planned for today.”

“These “town meetings” are starting to get pretty fucking old, there haven’t been any attacks in months.”

“Well no one expected the first attacks and look what happened. Anything is possible and if we aren’t prepared we might just end up dead. And thanks for giving me something to base my speech around, for today.” He leans down and kisses her.

“Yeah, whatever, you’re lucky you’re so smart or else people really wouldn’t give a shit about anything you had to say.”

“You would think the impending apocalypse would have something to do with it but no, it’s all me.” He says smiling at her.

She flips him off and starts getting ready.

 

About 60 people showed up to the town meeting which was a lot considering the HVF “disbanded” when the government shut it down.

Lip took the podium and spoke.

“I just want to start off by welcoming all of our new members and I also want to welcome our visitor from the Department of PDS services Mr. Vincent Heller. He’s been sent here by the government to monitor our meetings.”

The crowd booed, and someone might’ve even thrown something at him. Lip tried to hide his laughter as he tried settle the crowd down. They eventually did and he spoke again.

 

“We’re living in a world where real monsters exist. The government wants to sugar coat it and slap a Band-Aid on the issue and tell us we’re safe. What would they know about our safety? When we needed the troops during the rising to protect us, they were nowhere to be found. And now they’re putting these rogue, rabid monsters back in our community, our homes, passing laws to protect them and we’re just supposed to accept that, to support them. Who’s gonna protect us? They’re vicious killers! End of story. Most of us have seen it firsthand. Seen our friends and family torn apart by the undead army. Now I’m not asking you to fight for our side. I’m telling you that when this war is over and this community rises from all its pain and suffering, I’m still gonna be standing, and you can make the choice right here, right now to make sure you’ll be standing right there with me.”

The crowd cheered as he spoke. He always knew the right thing to say.

“Now the lack of recent attacks has some people questioning about the efficacy of our organization. But let me ask you this, did we see the first attacks coming? Nothing could’ve prepared us for the rising. Revolutions happen overnight and we have to prepare ourselves for whatever else is coming our way. Anything is possible, we know that now, and we as a group are making the decision to be on the winning side when the time comes. 

“As always, thank you for coming. Our Vice President Iggy Milkovich is now going to talk about how we can make our town safer.”

Iggy took the stand after Lip to talk about doing nightly patrols and weapons training. They had people sign up for specific times to patrol the streets. They also had a list of families they thought might be affected by PDS, the Gallagher’s conveniently left off.  
Lip walked over to Mandy shaking a few hands on his way. 

“That might’ve been your best speech yet.” 

“Mostly thanks to you.” He puts his arm around her waist and watches as Mr. Heller takes the stand.

The crowd was already booing and it was clear no one really cared what he had to say.

“Hi, I’m Vincent Heller. I understand that many of you share Mr. Gallagher’s opinion of the PDS Care Initiative. I just want to remind everyone that the PDS Protection Act protects not only Partially Deceased Syndrome sufferers but non PDS sufferers as well. When they first rose from the graves they were in a very primitive state but now they are properly medicated and properly monitored.”

The crowd got pretty rowdy but it was for a good reason. This man came to their meeting to tell them about their safety when he didn’t even live there.

Lip didn’t bother to settle the crowd down until Vincent left, and that’s when he realized he really liked having people that were this loyal to him.

The crowd cheered as took the podium again. “Alright, alright. Thanks everyone for coming. As always donations are always welcome, our donation box is next to our Treasurer Colin Milkovich, and I will hopefully see you guys next week.” 

They made about 2,000 dollars that day. Plus membership fees for new members, so it was overall a good day. 

“So what are your plans for the rest of the day?”

“The usual, Alibi with your dad and your brothers, and I might go home for a bit to drop some money off, so I’ll see you later.”

“Okay. Remember that thing I told you about a few weeks ago.” Lip immediately knew what she was talking about but he was trying to block it out.

“Yea, what about it?” He asked already knowing where the conversation was going.

“I might have to bring it by the apartment for a few days.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” When he saw her reaction he knew he had to compromise. “Fine, but only because I love you, and this stays between us.”

“Thank you, I love you too. And make sure they get home in one piece.” She said referring to her brothers. They kissed and then she left.

*****

After a few hours and a few drinks too many Lip found himself walking to his house.  
He stumbled into the kitchen not expecting Ian to be there.

“Karen was here earlier, she wanted to thank you for bringing us to the treatment center.”

“And, what’s your fucking point?” Lip said trying to avoid looking at Ian.

“You act like you don’t give a shit that I’m back but you were the one who made it possible for me to be back here.”

“I don’t give a shit that you’re back.” He said looking at Ian. “You should’ve stayed dead.”

“I’m guessing you’re expecting me to storm off now right? Well I’m not the same boy from years ago.”

“You sure look the fucking same.”

“You know what fuck you Lip, I tried to put myself in your shoes and I get why you’re mad but if our roles were reversed I would’ve forgiven you in a heartbeat.”

“Fuck you too! And you wouldn’t know that because you haven’t experienced it.” Lip pushed Ian out of his way. “I’m only here to put money in the squirrel fund that’s it. I didn’t come here to see you, I didn’t come here to have a fucking heart to heart.” After he put the money in the squirrel fund he left.

Ian resumed his place at the kitchen table and few minutes passed and the door opened again.

 

“You killed yourself the night you found out Mickey died. You didn’t even talk to me. Out of all people.”

“I know that, I might’ve been thinking irrationally but I couldn’t live in a world without Mickey. I can’t live in a world without Mickey.” He said more definitively.

“Well he’s gone and you just have to accept that now like you should’ve all those fucking years ago.” Lip left and it was clear he wasn’t coming back.

*****

The walk to his apartment was filled with anger. Why the fuck would Ian think Lip would be so eager to forgive him. Even if it hurt Lip to do so, he needed to hate Ian not because he was a PDS sufferer but because he did a fucked up thing.

He dreaded going back to his apartment because he knew what was waiting for him.  
When Lip opened the door, there he was, Mickey Milkovich in all his infinite fucking glory, with two giant “X” shaped scars on the left side of his face. Clearly he had been through a lot. 

“Hey”. Mickey says.

“Hey… Welcome back, I guess. Where’s Mandy?” Mickey pointed to the bedroom.

“So what’s the plan?” Lip asks smugly.

“I have no fucking idea.” 

In that moment they both knew they were screwed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's so hard to not use the word Zombie but I'm trying. Also when I started writing this I thought it was gonna be so easy, I was sadly mistaken.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!... If anyone reads this. Also if haven't watched In the Flesh, you probably should, its amazing.


End file.
